Cleveland Rocks

When we told people we were going to Cleveland, the reaction generally was 'Why?' Clearly Cleveland has an image problem because it rocked.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is huge. Six storeys of history, memorabilia, sound and video clips was expected.

Unexpected was the 'Garage', which had guitars, drums and keyboard so visitors could get in touch with their inner Rock God. Some of the other visitors had great skills. Us, not so much.

Topping it off was live karaoke, which was a 'garage band' that allowed visitors to join in, be it lead vocals or on one of the instruments. Those who we heard having a go were fantastic, and would not be embarrassed playing a gig.

We had been advised that three hours would be enough for this attraction. In reality, if you have any interest in music then that is not enough.

Having failed to keep really up close and personal with wildlife in Alaska, we thought a visit to the local African Safari Park might be in order. 

The entertainment here starts with a drive through area, with cups of food to feed hordes of deer and cattle. Sounds great in theory, and it certainly was entertaining. However, it has the unfortunate side effect of making the animals very aggressive in demanding to be fed... 

and often very successful at ripping the food cups out of your hands 

The other issue is that some of these animals have huge horns 

Alexa and Bob's modest Prius got away unscathed, with merely mud and slobber on the doors. Other vehicles were not so lucky, with scratches on their side. Worst hit was a stupidly big SUV with significant panel damage. 

In hindsight, the evident panel damage seemed directly proportional to the fuel consumption of the vehicle concerned. Perhaps the animals were making their own environmental protest? 

The second section was much tamer, with access only to 'safe' exhibits... 

... although the definition of 'safe' may not be intuitive... 

... and some caged exhibits did seem to have a very relaxed attitude to life. Clearly the inspiration for 'hakuna matata'... 

After such an exciting day, perhaps a quiet movie might be in order. The Oberlin cinema displayed its current attraction as 'Barbie Mutant Mayhem'. Really? That had to be worth a look. 

Unfortunately, the advertising was referring to two separate movies, so we settled on Barbie. 

Which, in case you have not yet seen it, is not a children's movie... 

Actually, given the mind boggling array of weird Barbie versions sold over the years that feature in the movie, perhaps Barbie Mutant Mayhem was accurate after all? 

OK, enough excitement. How about a pleasant paddle down a river to round things off, with Burning River Adventures. 

Yep, the Cuyahoga River is famous as 'the river that caught fire' in 1969, an event that galvanised the US to create their Environmental Protection Agency and to start passing legislation to clean up and protect the waterways. In fact, that was only a small fire compared to the nine fires that had preceded it, starting in 1868. 

Sometimes it takes a while for the message to sink in.... 

Today the river is healthy and beautiful. 

Don't be fooled by the apparent colour of the water in photographs. The water is so clear that one sees every rock, weed and muddy patch. Not to mention trout, eels, and snapping turtles. 

The kayak rental agency had a very cursory safety briefing, essentially being "There's a couple of sections of fast water, basically rapids. But you'll probably be OK". 

And that proved to be accurate advice as we happily paddled downstream... 

Almost. 

One of our party, in the middle of a wide, calm section, managed to hit the only rock for miles, and to get stuck. 

Thankfully they did not tip over, leading me to make the obvious Dad Joke that they were rocked but not rolled. 

But how did they miss seeing the only obstacle for miles around? Cue a visual pun - a picture is worth a thousand words:

So thank you Alexa and Bob for being such amazing hosts, and for the unexpected wild adventures!

Next stop, Chicago, as we prepare to really go wild....